SHAYLA hearts LIBRE

Libre (pronounced /ˈliːbrə/ in English) is a word in various Romance languages, including Spanish and French, and descends from the Latin word līber; they denote "the state of being free", as in "having freedom" or "liberty"

It took me 4 rough drafts to decide what I want to write for this paper and it took me 20 years to realize what I want the most in life- LIBERTY, LIBRE, FREEDOM…

Freedom of thought, of speech, of sleeping when I desire and waking when I wish to, reading when I want to and to not read when I am not in the mood.

I cant help lamenting over my overprotective parents, who have the same answer for all my questions and that is- NO. I wont call them conservative, but the problem is that they love me too much. And I always feel stifled and nailed (to the ground) courtesy this love. However, now that im in Chandigarh, away from their eyes and out of the shell, Im making sure that I rediscover myself and enjoy the freedom.

(Talking in third person helps when writing about yourself because using too much of I’s and Me in a paper makes it look like a braggers lexis.)

Welcome to Shayla’s weird weird world, where awkward moments define her life. Shayla is a partially paranoid, marginally obese (healthy by Indian standards) girl who is driven by crazy mood swings (negativity intended). She has many acquaintances but a few friends. And thanks to her non judgemental nature she totally fails to bitch about people around her. Shayla accepts everyone around her for whatever they are, but the only problem is that she expects them to reciprocate similarly. But all in vain. A very ambitious girl, with practical and reasonable goals in life.

ALSO adventurous shayla’s life ranges from doing things like getting off a bus at 9pm in the middle of the road or drinking beer while walking upto the 35 sector market or riding a rickshaw, while the rickshaw wala sits back and relaxes on the passenger’s seat. All the attention thus received is very well appreciated and also reciprocated (if required).The biggest problem with shayla is that she is confused (even right now). She cant take decisions quickly; not that she has a faulty sense of judgement its just that she is not always able to decipher the right POA (plan of actions) for a particular situation. Shayla each day struggles to live freely without any mental constraints, an endowment of her upbringing and the society she inhabits. Its like the song’I want to breakfree’ was made for her.

Shayla’s biggest asset is her gut feeling, her inner conscience that guides her through the twisted roads of life and the fact that she has experienced failure makes her an emotionally strong person. Gifted with a capability to cheer anyone up with a horrendous laughter (hear it to believe it) and slapstick sense of humor, she manages to live life to the fullest with a sparkle in her eyes and that very important tool with her- Confidence.

‘TIS DARWINISM AT ITS BEST

“Unaccustomed to the pleasures of a good night sleep, I had practically turned into a nocturnal specie, that’s when I decided to be a Cabby, that’s how I adapted to the situation…”

As bizarre as it sounds, Bibek Rao, 23 years old a quality auditor at Evalueserve , was layed off like many of his colleagues, but he decided to fight with the situation instead of being docile and accepting what was thrown at him. He immediately grabbed the vacancy of a cabby in his firm. Now his daily schedule includes picking up and dropping people from Gurgaon suburbs, “it’s an easy task I have been living here for quite a while now; I am quite familiar with the routes.” Says Bibek flippantly. At a time when there are people becoming suicidal, consulting shrinks or are are financially challenged. Bibek is my hero as he emerged out of the state of self pity, and chose to take things under his control.

“I decided to look at the brighter side of things; having lost on the fun guys my age have thanks to the busy schedule I’m treating the current situation as a break from that schedule. I am actually doing what I love to do- I get to drive late in the night on the Delhi roads; I get to make friends with my colleagues. I am utilizing this time to re-instigate some lost values and identify my strengths so that I can play on them as and when the need arises”

Also coming down from a cushy job and a plump pay packet, to a dreary driver’s job with barely enough to lay meal on the table of his family, Bibek each day realizes his loss and in turn gets grittier to work hard to make the ends meet. He looks over worked and undernourished.

There are some upcoming opportunities in other firms, but he refuses to consider them, he wants to start where he left. Perhaps not from the same post. What keeps him motivated to do his current job? “The fact that at least I’m close to my workplace. Each day after dropping my colleagues in the front porch, I go and sit in the concierge and read the newspapers. I wait for my turn to climb up to the 12^th floor to my desk; everyday I wait for the elevator to open…”

There will be NO IPL this year

Sponsors suffering from Losses. Sri Lankan players Injured. Pakistan literally banished from the IPL matches. A handful of players left. Spectators scared. Other players skeptical about the game. Teams and Franchisers in shreds. A widespread pandemonium. So there might be no IPL matches this year. No 2^nd season series. Courtesy Pakistan’s scandalous welcoming strategy. The million cricket fans waiting eagerly for the month long series might have to wait till the next year, for the next season. Where an Ex-head of the state has proclaimed an end of cricket for his country-Pakistan. The repercussions of the attack are going to dangerous-yet inevitable. The Pak will not be entertained anymore in the IPL, (irrespective of the fact that most of the players were banned from touring India anyway). The Sri Lankan cricketers who have suffered multiples injuries will take time to recover physically and mentally- emotionally. After facing a trauma of this degree, they are not proficient enough to start playing cricket. Do you think Indian players and Australian + England team players alone can play the series? A major chunk of fine players will be missing. The players might recover from their physical injuries but what about the sponsors of the IPL and the tours. They might just not heal-up of the financial injuries. At a time when the market is crashing on our head. IPL was considered a life saving boat, which thanks to Pakistan is already cracking up. So what are the teams left with, a handful of players. So there might just be 20 players for playing 20-20 series.

the long and short of it...

Is it just me, or everybody thinks that woman with short hair are taken more seriously. What is it about them that changes our way of looking at them. Do u think a woman with long hair is still seen as a self indulgent, seductress(well maybe!) spending time and effort in taking care of her hair. And the woman with shorter hair is miss spic n span (clear), doesn't spend too much time decorating her hair and hence gets more time to focus on her career. DUH!
I always thought women with long hair were beautiful, are beautiful. The ones with shorter hair, no offenses are just...different. After observing a lot, i have noticed that the women with shorter length hair are said to have an intellectual air around them.
I saw a couple enter a shop in a posh market place, the wife had short lenght hair . The moment the sales guy saw her, he started to converse in english. haha.....
After her entered an elegant lady in a salwar kameez, ofcourse with long braided hair, the man not only came back to his (our) mother tongue, he also forgot his mannerisms, by almost arguing with her. This is really funny....
Why do people associate smartness and brains with shorter length hair. For all you know she might have burnt her hair, courtesy straightening rod or watever it is.
Anyways, my history teacher used to tell me that stereotyping(generalization) is the best way of understanding the complex human nature, and identifying the various types of human beings that surround us. This method is adopted by many people.
Hence, i shall leave people in their own bubbles where woman with long hair are homely and short hair are-the Career Ladies.
hahahaha

My trip to the bookshop....

Yesterday I went to the bookshop and spent my very own sweet time in the shop, looking at all the books, touching them feeling them, connecting with them. I liked many of them, I loved some of them and in the end decided to buy 3 of them. Jane Austen’s Emma, Curfewed Nights by Bashrat Peer, Lead your life by Louise Hay.

Earlier I used to read books suggested by my friends, but now I have started to explore my own preferences, I take books that interest me, intrigue me. I have my very own, super original way of choosing a book. If, for instance I find a book’s cover attractive I pick it up in my hands, get a feel of the cover (no my hand doesn’t have those censors), and then I flip open page no. 30 on the book and start reading it. According to me, the text on this page connotes the kind of book it is going to be, and if I should read it or not. Honestly, that’s exactly how I go about it; page no. 30 is the page that helps me decide whether the book is my lover or a chariot for deep slumber or sheer torture.

After choosing the books I went up to the cash counter, the lady at the counter being extra nice, “oh nice choice of books!”.(What was I, the first buyer of the day??), “thank you”, I said politely while rummaging through my bag for my wallet. That’s when it started. I started to think whether I actually wanted these books, will I like them, will I be able to read them, what if they end up sitting around my table- virgin, what if mom finds out that I am spending all my money on the books, when I should be out shopping for clothes or something, that girls my age do?? Ah! That’s too many questions, I stood still for sometime in front of the extra nice lady at the counter, with my wallet in my hand, staring at those books and spaced out. I nevertheless paid for the books, my heart oscillating between the heart chamber and my knees. I felt guilty. Guilty of having spent my father’s hard earned money on these books. I have no right to indulge or be extravagant using his money. Indulgence is one skill that I have never learnt. (I think indulging means enjoying to the core, anything that I do.) I started to walk towards the rickshaw pullers to go home. Walking like a zombie, I managed to find a rickshaw puller to deliver my guilty soul home (hostel). This is the reason that I can’t shop, Im totally unable to participate in this normal girls leisure activity. The guilt is too much to handle, its way more than the pleasures the new things might bring.

Well I was zapped back to reality by the rickshaw wallahs, question,”kidhar utarna hai, market mein ya kothi mein?” (where do u want to get off in the market or the bunglow area?). “Market mein” (in the market are). After getting off I went home had a cup of tea and started to read through the books. I realized I wont be able to shop if don’t start earning. But till then, window shopping is a very good idea!

Love in times of recession...

I just finished my second trimester midterm exams (aah! the slow process of getting the graduate tag, without learning much...). I went out with my buddies to parrrtay!!! all excited i saw a couple in the marketplace quarreling over some issue. As i crossed them i just happened(trust me) to hear a part of their conversation. The boy was lamenting over his unemployed status and the girl was patiently lending her ear to him. They looked upset. I was wondering, since when was the boy unemployed as the market is down since the last October. How does he afford those dates with the girl?? Wow, thats a very rare specie (guy) right there, infront of me.
Anyways, i soon got distracted by hot guys on a wet n chilly winter and forgot about the alien i saw. (hah!)
We reached home about half an hour later than the in-time of my hostel and i saw a saddened look on my friend's face, I immediately knew it wasnt because i got back late, something must have happened with her bf again. Me, the self proclaimed inquisitive agony aunt went upto her and got her into a rendevouz with me. In the course of the conversation i realised that again the bf's obvious source of anguish was the job that he wasnt't getting. She was really teary eyed while talking about him. Obviously she cared for him, was worried about him. But had had enough of the nagging. Talking about the empty mind a devil's workshop, a cliche but fits here so nevertheless. She felt better after a few rounds around the garden and a tete-e-tete about things ranging from her problems...to my problems...to other people' problems...to people without any problems...
Later in the night the caffeine addict in me made me climb up and down the two floors of my hostel, few times in search of an electric kettle which i was told is with K or R or S or Vendy or god knows who all. (yup its a public kettle).....such meanies they made me work hard for my reward-a steaming cuppa coffee. (Who are they...Pavlov(s)??) I saw my friend packing her bags, she was leaving for her dad's house tomorrow. What? Dads house? "ummm I hope alls well...like ur folks dont stay together". M said, "Noooo, its not that. Its like my dad works somewhere and my mom stays in the family home." Oh ok! So here's another case of love suffering due to the recession.
This makes me sing the song, "money, money always funny in the big man's world...", but in the small man's world(the common man) money is seriously not funny. I had heard of the various suicides in US, due to the loss of financial aid for the families. I really think heartbreak or separation from the beloved is as appalling as the suicide. (i have died twice...)
All these heartbreaks, heartaches, separations are courtesy crashed market.

I just hope the situation gets better sooon...i cant see my own love nest falling flat on the ground due to the strong winds of recession.
Im proud of all those who are holding on to their loved ones even in such trying times and not getting impatient with them, but im even more proud of the people who are coping with the problem hands-on and not by hands(or legs or tongues or heads) on other people.